Sitting in the Court of Buddha

My cousins happened to stay at my home yesterday (30/07). Since it was holiday, my mom asked us out for a trip. At first, she wanted to go to Tritis. FORTUNATELY, Ndy and Sien had been there before. (Yuck! Can you imagine me going on a pilgrim to a holy sanctuary??? I might not be able to make it back in a whole body! Hehehehe!). So, as the alternative, I asked them whether they’ve been to small temples around Yogya or not. Turned out, they never went there. Thus, it was decided that we would visit Candi Sambisari, Candi Kledulan, Candi Sari, and Candi Plaosan. Actually we also planned to go to Candi Ijo and Candi Kalasan, but those kiddos were tired already………

Not much to say about Candi Sambisari. It is very beautiful, safe, well organized, but very sterile. Umm, Sterile? Well, in some extends, it felt very ‘safe’ and doesn’t have that many ‘things’. Ehehehehe!

Candi Kledulan? Well, it was still excavated though. So, we only saw the excavation site. Good for the kiddos, though. They can see the process of excavation. Sien even said that the process of reviving the temple is just similar to the process of constructing humongous puzzle. Hehehehehe!

Candi Sari gave us creep. Well, not that it was totally creepy; it was very solemn and silent indeed. Cold and breezy indeed. However, I felt some slight of chill when looking at the left chamber. Something startled me, but I just didn’t know what it was yet. So, I decided to enter the right chamber first, along with everybody. It was very calm and soothing. I went to the left chamber together with my dad. It was darker than the other chamber though, and the atmosphere was so tight. I realized which part startled me there. It was the hole for the missing statue under the Kala Makara. Later outside, I heard Ndy said to us that she saw someone very big at that very spot, under the Kala Makara. She didn’t have the courage to re-enter the temple, so I did with mum. Yes, the guardian was there, the very old and powerful one from the ancient era of that temple’s glorious moment. He’s still there, standing firmly.

We continued to Candi Plaosan. Well, I didn’t have that much expectation though. As far as I knew, it was just another small temple in the rural area, just in the same level of Candi Sari, Sambisari, Kalasan, and such. However, a twist happened. It grew! The second temple was almost finished built. The foundation of the third main temple was found. Many candi perwara has been restored, and the air photo showed that the whole complex of this Candi Plaosan, along with its vihara like that in Mendut, will be bigger than Borobudur or even Angkor Wat. And the small temples around it were many and in a relatively small distance among another. So, if everything is restored, then this will be biggest ancient temple complex in the world so far. The grandeur of this complex is totally astonishing. I can even imagine how this complex used to be, the centre of the syncretism between Hinduism and Buddhism, the destination of pilgrimage, a hidden library of philosophy, and a great school of life, along with many scholars and monks.

Enough talking about the grandeur of the construction. As I entered the only opened main temple (sure, one is being reconstructed, and one is only the foundation yet!), I saw another three-chamber-temple. Nothing like Candi Sari though. Every chamber was so grand, with a couple of Buddha statues of different rudra. Those two statues each with different persona, anima and animus. One was big in built, and the other one is slimmer, just like a queen and a king, though all the statues were representing male Buddha Avalokitesvara. The atmosphere was very much like a palace.

Now, to the most interesting part of the story! The third main temple. As you know from my story, it was only a foundation with no wall. However, there were 21 statues of Buddha, each with different built. They were formed in some kind of court formation. Seven in front and five in each side. You could even say that they were having meeting, with Gaotama as the centre (the position of the leader). Too bad, the broken statue of Tara, the only female Buddha (yet also regarded as the avatar of Avalokitesvara according to the ancient syncretism belief) was not put there. The other statues were not complete either.

I walked around the statues, looking each one carefully. From the slimmest figure to the fattest one (Was the fat figure supposed to be the Laughing Buddha?), examined Gaotama in the centre (so far, this is the most complete statue, and the only figurative close to the original Buddha, while the others are the usual figurative of Javanese Buddha!).

Tempted by the unusual atmosphere, I tried to look for the centre of the circle. Quite easy, since there were some pointer there. Taking a straight line from Gaotama statue, I stood at that spot. IT WAS AMAZING! You will feel like you were standing in a royal hall surrounded by the court of Buddha. You could also feel the power and force. Ever saw Monkey King, in the scene of Heaven Court? That was like it!

Something inside me said that I should sit at that spot. I did sit! However, the voice said that I should sit in a meditation pose. I felt very comfortable, but my other side was frightened. I even felt like closing my eyes and started meditating. I know that I should do it, but at the same time, I was also afraid that I couldn’t get back to my body, to reality. Yet, I decided to close my eyes for some seconds. It felt very calm and comfy. I snapped my consciousness and promised to get back to the complex later on.

At home, I contemplated and rethink that experience. And I realized, the forces there are even older than those usually absorbed by other people seeking for power. Older than the forces in the imperial palace. You could even say that this is an ancient force in its purest form. Seeing from the origin of Plaosan, we may conclude that this force is the result of puja, a very constant and sincere puja.

Wew!

Dream Journal 2 - Cleaning Up Girl's Room

I had another dream again. This time, it was another task of cleaning up. And strangely, it happened also in the night. A dark and cloudy night, and I was standing in front of an old four leveled building. My intuition said that there was nobody within the structure, I meant, not a single living carbon-based creature.

I went there, only to see empty rooms everywhere. However, it felt like as though I have a guide inside my mind. The formless sound told me that the first floor was the living room and a kitchen. Totally neat, like it was left behind only an hour ago by the inhabitants. In the corner of the building, I saw something odd. There was an elevator, old one. Something unusually exist in the family home, eh?

By the elevator, I went to the second floor only to find the empty main bedroom. So silence and old, but warm by the light bulbs. Finding nothing here, I went up to the third floor. The sound told me that this was the daughter's room. Everything was similar to the other rooms, but the door to the daughter's room was emitting darkness. Being pushed by unknown force within me, I opened the door.

Guess what did I find there? A dark and messy room, with a little girl laying on the bed. From my first seeing her, I already knew that she's not human being. But seeing her struggling with pain, I couldn't help but helping her. So, I lifted her up from the bed, put her on the sofa in front of her room, and started to clean it.

It was so dark, full of trash, no fresh air, and so messed up! It would be a hardwork for me, had I not found the big mirror in the end of the room. Strange thing, the reflection in the mirror was a clean and neat room. When I touched that mirror, the room suddenly cleaned itself.

After the room had been cleaned, I went back to the girl. She looked much healthier than before. She looked at me and said, "Thanks for cleaning up my room. I know that I can count on you. But, I have another wish, would you like to help me again?" I nodded.

"My body was hidden somewhere under my bed. Please, find it. I cannot do that by myself. This is my last wish!" I nodded again. Taking the tools right beside her room, I moved the bed and started to break the floor. This time, I didn't find something to ease my work.

After some times, I found the skulls and all her bones. She cried happily. "Thanks! Thank you for finding my body! Now I can go back with my father and mother!" That girl hugged me once, and I can see her father and mother behind her, waited for her. She went to her parents and they all waved at me.

I woke up then, saw the clock. It was 2.58................

(Masih Terpengaruh dari) Kuliahnya Debby 4 - Memboringkan

Maaf, setelah sekian lama tidak menulis artikel yang agak berbau-bau ilmiah, daku kembali lagi dengan bahasa Indonesia. Hmm, bukannya kehilangan kemampuan untuk berbahasa Inggris dengan baik dan benar, tapi sepertinya artikel ini lebih bagus ditulis dalam bahasa Indonesia. Apalagi, sudah sekian lama daku tidak menjamah bahasa ini dalam tulisan. (Iyalah, nulisnya skripsi mulu! Pake bahasa Inggris mulu!!) Yah, hitung-hitung latihan menulis kembali dengan bahasa Indonesia. Hehehehe! (Matamu, doel!)

Hmmm, sebenernya artikel ini akan berkisah tentang kisah bahasa Indonesia sendiri, makanya kupaksakan menulis dengan bahasa Indonesia. (Duh, mungkin memang bener kata teman2, daku lebih pantas pake bahasa Inggris. Bahasa Indonesiaku ki jowo banget je! Medhok-medhok ra cetha!)

Alkisah sangibul hikayat, di sebuah negeri yang gemah ripah loh jinawi (BUKAN!!!! Bukan gemah ripah loh jinawi yang saru itu lo!!!), ada sebuah stasiun TV yang banyak menayangkan program reality show. Ada tiga orang yang baru ngetop di reality2 show itu saat ini. Yang satu pendek dan tua, yang kedua pendek-ngondek-cong-nyolot, dan yang ketiga si-cong-raksasa-muka-lebar-rambut-sasak-tinggi-nyodok-langit. (Yea, yea, yea, we know them! Give us something we don’t know!)

Hmmm, saya bukannya akan mengomentari penampilan mereka yang sudah banyak disanjung dan disandung oleh blog-blog yang lain. Hanya, sedikit penasaran juga dengan si cong-raksasa-muka-lebar yang konon katanya pernah tinggal di Kanada itu. Apa sih sebenernya yang dia lakukan di Kanada sono??? Jangan-jangan tinggal di Kanada, tapi ngomongnya pake bahasa Gorila, uups, Tarzan maksudnya!

Kenapa saya bisa bilang gitu? Gampang. Waktu dia mengomentari salah satu peserta reality show itu (duh, saking ga pentingnya jadi lupa siapa namanya. Sebut saja X), dia bilang gini, “X, saya tidak menikmati penampilan kamu hari ini. Membosankan. Hari ini kamu benar-benar memboringkan!”

Ya? Sudah tahu mana yang mau dikomentari???

MEMBORINGKAN!!!!!! Itu dia yang menggelitik telinga. Kenapa boring harus diberi tambahan me-kan untuk menyatakan membosankan???? Inilah salah kaprah orang Indonesia selama ini!

Boring itu artinya sudah membosankan! Dan kata dasarnya adalah bore. Imbuhan –ing di belakang kata bore itu pada esensinya hampir mirip dengan imbuhan me-kan atau me-i dalam bahasa Indonesia. Jadi, ketika si raksasa-bodoh-yang-kata-fa-suka-pake-daster-di-kamar itu mengutarakan kata-kata itu, otak yang di dalam kepala nyong ini langsung beraksi bak Jimmy Neutron, “Berpikir! Berpikir! Berpikir!” PLASH!

Berarti memboringkan itu artinya memmembosankankan atawa memmembosankani. Loh? Kok bisa? Yup! La wong membosankan mau ditambah dengan imbuhan me-kan (atau me-i). Mubazir kan?????

Lalu, mari kita pahami kembali motivasi penggunaan kata-kata memboringkan itu. Apa alasannya??? Gampang! Anak kecil aja tahu, ngomong pake bahasa Inggris itu keren! Jadi, alasannya biar terlihat keren dan terpelajar. Ngomongnya pake sok inggris gitu, sok menyelipkan kata-kata bahasa Inggris.

Tapi, mari kita lihat sisi yang lain, sisi positifnya. Kalo menurut Laudya Cinthya Bella, marilah kita BERPIKIR POSITIVE THINKING!!!!! (WHAT??? Another dumb sentence??) Atau seperti cerita Cha tentang salah satu artis yang membangga-banggakan anaknya yang kepengen berangkat umroh. “Anda tahu, anak saya itu INTERESTING sekali ingin berangkat umroh!)

Kalo saya yang jadi wartawan infotainmentya, pasti sudah kemocap begini, “Waduh bu, saya tahu kalo anak ibu mungkin MENARIK bagi ibu, tapi ya jangan disombong-sombongkan gitu. Nah, kalo mau nyombongin anak tuh, karena dia INTERESTED sekali buat berangkat umroh!” Wah, pasti deh si artis itu bakal ketampar-tampar setengah mati di muka publik. (Eh, mbak, jangan namparin diri sendiri! Saya juga mau bantuin nampar kok! Hehehehehe!)

Yah, berhubung tidak baik mencela orang, marilah kita tutup tulisan ini dengan komentar di iklan Stardut yang baru saja tayang di TV. “Saya boring nih!” Huekekekekekekekekekekeke!!!!

PS : Buat yang belum sadar, saya boring itu arti sebenarnya adalah “Saya membosankan nih!” bukannya “Saya bosan nih!”
Buat mereka-mereka, saya tetap doain kok, biar nanti ada orang asing yang denger dan ngetawain mereka keras-keras. Hehehehe.... (Kok begitu nulis bahasa Indonesia jadi jahat gini???)

My Cards

I accidentally took the test to decide my card from Tarot Deck. Hmm, they managed to divide it into some section, which are My Power Cards, My Lucky Cards, My Desire Cards, My Core Cards, and My Growth Cards. According to those people, the growth cards and the desire cards might change, but the other cards will stay the same. Well, I took this test for fun actually, but the explanation of the cards really astonished me. (Those are sooooo me!)

My Core Cards are The Hermit and The High Priestess. Wow! The core cards represent mymost basic traits--all that I am begins with the influences associated with these cards. And here is the explanation.

The Hermit denotes a need to have some space between you and everyday hustle and bustle of our busy world. The Hermit needs to retreat. Indeed, happiness for The Hermit requires seclusion, freedom for material wants, and time for intense introspection. The answers The Hermit needs cannot be found in our physical world. The truths he seeks are internal, spiritual, and the distraction of a well developed social life can only impede his quest for his personal truths. Still, although not anything remotely resembling extrovertism, The Hermit does sometimes need to share time with others; so he can learn or teach, guide or be guided. The Hermit’s time spent amongst people depletes his energy quickly. To avoid an overlord he has to retreat from social settings quickly.

When The High Priestess is among your personal cards, the influence of The Hermit may be increased. Having The World or The Lovers in your personal cards may diminish the influence of The Hermit.

While the other card, The High Priestess said this. Completely feminine and the counterpart to The Magician, the High Priestess is the Gatekeeper of the subconscious, the unknown. She travels in worlds which most of us only glimpse in our dreams. Her realm is that of unseen truths, untapped potentials, and hidden dangers. The Calling of The High Priestess is to go beyond the obvious and visible to tap those powers which are veiled from normal vision. While she is passive by nature, she has the power to uncover unknown potential and is very aware of the infinite potential all humans harbor within them. She is also very patient. She is also very patient. She can wait for events to blossom in their own time.

When The Hermit or Hanged Man are among your personal cards, the influence of The High Priestess may be increased. Having the Magus in your personal cards may diminish the influence of The High Priestess.

Awww, so nice... Meaning that my core cards are mainly about ethereal realm. And those two are supporting one another.......

My Power Cards and Lucky Cards are same. The High Priestess and The Justice!!! Wow! (Is this a coincidence? Since I was born under the sign of Libra!)

Justice signifies the principle that although things sometimes seem askew the Universe is ultimately fair. We may not see or understand why things happen, but most of us sense there is in fact a reason and that balance exists even when we cannot see it. Justice denotes fairness regardless of who you are. At its purest the forces embodied by Justice give us the power to see without bias, and the courage to be accountable for our actions. These powers also test our faith at times. These powers also give us the tools and strength to fight injustice in our everyday life. All we have to do is use them.

When The Emperor is among your personal cards, the influence of Justice may be increased. Having The Devil in your personal cards may diminish the influence of Justice

Good... Nice nice nice... Meaning, I am an introverted person with the tendency of unveiling things, seeing something hidden deep behind the ethereal realm of subconscious. I also tend to look for fairness and equality. No wonder everything revolved around investigation, balance, and reflection. Gosh!

But, isn't it fun knowing that your power comes from justice and subconscious realm? Coming from the process of knowing yourself better?


COOOOOOOL!

Relationship vs Partnership? Single is better........

Non once said to me, “I can’t imagine you being in a relationship!”

Wow, I shocked at that time. Protesting, I said, “Meaning? I will be single for the rest of my life?”

“Nope. I mean, I just can’t imagine you being in a relationship. You’re not the kind of guy who will be in a relationship. For me, you are meant for a partnership!”

Again, I protested. “Partnership as in gay?”

She shook her head. Grinning maliciously, she continued, “Well, if you chose it, you can do it. But by mentioning partnership, I refer to any kind. You want someone equal, and that will not happen in a relationship. It can be reached through partnership instead. That’s what I mean!”

I kept protesting at the time. All this time, I kept giving her proof that I can also be in a relationship. But my recent ‘crush story’ (Oi, emphasis that! Crush story, not a love story!) proved otherwise. I realized that yeah, I prefer equal relation rather than one where I should take care of the other all the time.

Yep, the recent one gave me that. I felt the euphoric work of this ‘crush’ at first. But as time goes by, I started to doubt my own feeling. There was some fright that I will not be as free as I used to be, that I will not have the time for myself. Well, seeing from the fact that I had a crush on someone younger than me, mean I had to deal with bunch of messages everyday, monitoring and checking. Wow wow wow, that is so not me, eh? That moment has been passed eon ago for me…….. (Yeah, like you’re old already?) I still have my own world outside that. Just like Kiky said, “Having a girlfriend is a part of your world, but you still have other parts of your own world!”

At that moment, when I chatted with Non, she reminded me again of her words. And I realized that it is true (for now, eh?). I really want someone equal in a relationship. But due to the fact that most girls saw man as someone above them, this is something very difficult. “You should find an older woman, dude!” said her. “That way, you won’t need to ‘baby sit’ her all the time!”

“Or wait,” said Cha. “Probably the one is still a girl, not yet a woman. You have to wait her blossoming into a lady for you! Because you want a mature relationship. This is quite difficult with all these girls around you!”

The thing is I finally realized my need to be free. My need to fool around with myself with no burden.. At least for now…….

PS : This is the clarification of the confusion in the July 5’s posting!

Dream Journal 1 - Cleaning Up The Graveyard

Okay, I'm writing about the series of my dream. Firstly, I'd like to say that I often have the dream of journeying into 'another world'. And some are unimaginably creepy yet interesting. So, here I am sharing the dreams, who knows that one of the guys out there might be able to gave me another interpretation.

So, last nite I dreamed of attending a certain event at Kotabaru Church. But quite unusual, the setting was a very foggy night. Cold and the sight scope was very limited. Somewhere near that church was a very old graveyard, probably originated back to the 18th century. So damn creepy that nobody wants to get near the place. Originally in the real world, there is no such graveyard in the area. It had been abandoned for eons.

However, I got the task to clean up the graveyard. Nobody else wanted to do that, and I was the only one gutsy enough to tackle the job. But, I couldn't do it alone overnight, so I needed to ask for some help. I asked people there, but no one volunteered themselves. Thus, I decided to walk out from the room, to the parking area of the church. I met some unexpected people there. There were Bu Lani (in Kebaya), my old pal Dian Sapi, and Liana (another old friend of mine). Bu Lani was in a hurry to get home soon since there was an important business.

Liana and Sapi decided to tag along with me. Thus, we went to the graveyard. Liana held my hand closely, while Sapi walked behind us. The road was very dark and cold. We could only see a metre in front of us. The fog was very thick.

We finally arrived in front of the graveyard's gate. It was made from joined wires. Tall grass everywhere, it looked untouched for decades. Liana grabbed me closer. "Is this the place?"

I nodded as a response. She screamed, "Are you freaking kidding me? Did you see the yellow spark in the centre of the graveyard? I wanted to get out of here as soon as possible!" She ran while grabbing my hand........ Sapi followed us.... Hence, the spooky graveyard was left unscathed by everyone.

Then I woke up........................ Still thinking of the yellow spark that I saw and wondered why should I be chosen to clean that up, why didn't I be afraid of the graveyard, and where the graveyard is actually located.

Wew, after a very long wait, I finally got a girl NOTICED me. She sent me these messages constantly every day, like asking me whether I've eaten or not. Reminding me to go to work, or else I'll be late, and such.

And, I like her too! I mean, this is the first time my feeling is reciprocal.

However, as time goes by, I started to get confused of my own feeling. Duh...

Would someone help me??????

Suck It, Zus!

Few days ago, I accidentally turned my TV channel on infotainment. It was Was-Was. Hmmm, I had no intention whatsoever to watch those dumb-celebrities-in-action-and-looking-for-sensation. Thanks God, it's on the presenter. Then suddenly, something started to stun me.

Well, certainly not the lady presenter, not her so-called-sexy-boobies, nor her is-that-a-plastic-or-a-lips. I never really paid any attention to such. But her congratulation to certain celebrities. (So unimportant that I don't even remember who!)

What is so wrong with the congratulation? Mmmm, VERY AMBIGUOUS.

She actually intended to say, Success to X and XX. However, the common mispronunciation in that word occurred here. Yep, she did say /sak/ for the first syllable rather than /sƏk/. But the most ridiculous thing is when she pronounced the last syllable like she would pronounce zus in Dutch which mean ma'am.

So in that very moment, my mind flew to the dirtiest of the dirtiest bottom of my very-wild-and-uncontrolled-imagination. Suck zus! Wow, wow, wow!!!!!

Yep, for you straight-minded or hypocrite-who-know-what-it-mean-but-try-to-deny-it, it means MOANING!!!!

BEWARE, IF YOU ARE NOT ON THE LEGAL AGE YET, SKIP THE NEXT PARAGRAPHS! Since I'm going to continue my imagination... Hehehehe!

Sexual moaning.... Suck it, zus! Suck it harder, zus!!! Oh yeah, zus! Come on, keep suck it, zus!

Wahahahahahaahahaha!!!!

I am still wondering whether that Astrid-something-I-don't-care-her-last-name were aware of this mispronunciation.

Remember dude, mispronunciation can bring an entirely different meaning to a sentence!!!!

PS : Duh, TV station, mind the language of your presenter please! I don't expect hearing “Slip of the THONG!” again instead of “Slip of the tongue!” Hehehehehehehe!!!!

Mr. Colombus, I Saw Your Profile!

What would you do if you happen to find a profile in a gay dating site, and that site happens to be your very close and long friend?

Well, this shouldn't be very surprising though, since my radar has been tickled on him from long time ago. But due to the fact that he is my very close friend, I tended to deny it. I kept saying to myself that he is not a gay, he's just an innocent boy who adored himself very much. Hoping that my every sentence would come true.

But the discovery of the profile has ruined it all. Seeing his name, I knew instantly that it really was him. Clicking on the link, I still hoped that at least he wrote bisexual in his sexuality tab. But turned out that it was clearly stated G.A.Y..........

I know I shan't do this, but I did cry. Yes, I'm crying in front of my computer, crying for him, crying for myself, for being such an asshole to myself, for my continuous denial, and for everything.

No wonder that he's been acting so strange when we gathered last time. It's probably because he's ashamed of himself, of worrying about the unveiling moment. Yep, he was very strict and not flexible.

It was very hard for me to really accept the fact. The slide show of his picture in the site was very painful. Every smile in that pictures brought another tear for me to shed. My chest seemed to burst anytime that I couldn't bear it anymore.

However, after spending a very rough nite, I woke up in joy the following morning. I recalled my resolution long ago, that I am not going to lose another friend whatever is the cause!

Thus, to my dear friend, wherever you are, you have to know, that I'm still your friend. No, we're still your friend! After all, we belong to the same gank ever since the elementary school, eh?

So Mr. Colombus, you are not the only queer here. We are queers in our own way! You can always turn to us anytime.